i was sitting at one of my favorite coffee stands this afternoon drinking a coffee. i saw some of my students and they sat and enjoyed a coffee with me. we sat and talked about life and the weather and what we really wanted. it was a nice chat.

one of the students decided he wanted something to eat so he ordered hot vit lon. he ordered semi-hatched duck eggs. i’ve descried it before, it’s an egg with a duck embryo inside. you can easily make out the features of the duck. it has wings, potential life and is dies clinging to it’s boiling yolk. i guess the pro-life vegetarians wouldn’t eat it but maybe the pro-choice vegetarians would.

when does a duck’s life begin? is it at conception?

well, the conversation continued and my friend ate the whole egg. he scooped the insides out from a whole he made at the top. at the end of his feast he smashed the egg shell. i asked him what he was doing. was he only being childish or was there a point to his violence.

he said that if he didn’t smash the egg he would go to hell. in hell he would be forced to fill a very large bucket with water using only the egg as a scooper. he also said that the source of water was very far away and that you would have to walk a long distance and try to be careful not to spill one drop.

i was impressed with his thorough knowledge of hell.

i commented that, since hell was undoubtedly hot, the heat would evaporate a lot of the water and that would make the job so much more difficult. i wondered if you could ask the devil for a lid. if you had a lid the job would be much simpler. maybe you could just put a large rock on the bucket. i also wondered if you could ring out your sweat stained shirt into the bucket and help yourself along. is it possible to fool beelzebub?

they sent me my drivers license today. i’ve waited about three weeks for it to arrive and was quite happy to get it.

it’s an extra large laminated card. it doesn’t fit where other cards would fit in my wallet. the front of the card is yellowish orange. the design spirals out from the seal of vietnam. in the middle on the left there is a small, color picture of me. i look quite anemic and pensive. it’s a strange combination and there’s a green stamp that runs through my left eye. above my head there is a metallic seal with a yellow star in the middle. the top of the card proclaims, “the socialist republic of vietnam.” below it is, “independence, freedom and happiness.” the vital statistics are listed below that. everything is correct except for my nationality. after it says “quoc tich” it says “vietnam”. i have been deemed an honorary vietnamese citizen, i guess. that really tickled my fancy. below everything there are more stamps and some official looking signatures. the back is more of the same. it lists what i’m allowed to drive and i’m only allowed to drive motorcycles that are between fifty and one hundred and seventy five cc. my license number is L429163 if anyone cares.

how are homes built in this mushy, tropical area? what must be taken into consideration for them to be successful?

there is a type of wood here that lines the shores of the mekong. it is thin and tall and soaks in water for ages. it is piled up, partially in the water, partially out. some people say it becomes harder than steel after it has soaked for a while. that becomes the foundation of all buildings.

the long, wood-steel poles are driven into the mud on a new construction site. there is a machine. it is an engine that sits on top of a metal pole. the pole rises about twenty feet into the air with the engine at the top. a piece of wood is brought in and placed under the engine. it is fastened securely and the engine is turned on. it spits and vomits black smoke into the air in small clouds. they rise and disappear. the engine is thrust into gear. it pounds down on the wooden steak and screams, driving it slowly into the mud. it takes a few minutes to completely submerge one of these logs and it's quite a sight. the wood bends and jumps and bark and splinters fly off. people stand idly by watching.

the foundation for the building i'm sitting in was built with this wood. the building is new and modern. it doesn't rest on stilts. the mekong delta has been built with the help of this wood. what else would you use for the foundation of a building that rests on mud. nothing else would suffice.

jack just took the dog to go get some banana ice cream. they take whole bananas and crush them up with coconuts, peanuts and milk. then it freezes. they have sticks in them.

the ice-cream is really good, especially when it's hot. i like it.

the dog went with jack running beside him while he biked through the mud. dogs like mud just like children do. jota comes back muddy and dirty and smiling. dogs also smile like children: when they've done something wrong.

in the ice-cream store, well, it's not a store but rather the front of someone's house, they're was a pile of sandals. jota must have found one that he either really liked or really didn't like. it was a man's, black leather sandal. he squatted over it in front of everyone and peed in it.

jack said people weren't too angry and most of them laughed. jota left and jack apologized.

this isn't the first time jota has peed in shoes. he peed on jack's sandals when he was a puppy. that was excusable because he was too small and didn't realize that there were certain places he could pee and other places he couldn't.

another time, a friend of ours came over. he was wearing black leather shoes. he took them off before entering the room, as is the custom, and jota found them. well, i was taking jota out for a walk and i stopped to chat for a bit. jota squatted over the shoe and peed inside of it. he looked up and smiled like a child.

in vietnam there are two types of girls. some girls are "hien" and some girls are "du dan".

"hien" girls are shy. they only speak when spoken to. they look at the ground and suck in their cheeks. they peek up with big, brown eyes and look sad or innocent. when they do speak it's only in the most muffled tones. you see their mouths moving but no sound is produced. you have to move your head closer to their mouths to hear anything. you have to ask them to repeat, repeat, repeat. they wear the most conservative clothes. they wear ao dai. they sit straight and ride motorcycles side saddle. these are the rural girls. this is the zenith of beauty. the quiet, shy, innocent girls are the most attractive. if she's got white skin, she's even better.

i can be quite cynical about "hien" girls. my culture dictates that beauty is something else entirely. i remember shy, innocent, quiet girls from high school. they weren't the most attractive. the most attractive girls were the ones that stood out from the rest of the group. the most attractive girls were the girls that took charge and lead with confidence as opposed to following meekly. i am surrounded by "hien" girls.

girls who are "du dan" are much more overt. for better or for worse, they exhibit western qualities. these girls are the ones that take charge and lead with confidence. these are the girls that voice their opinions. these are the girls who speak loud enough for all to hear.

mostly, these girls can be found in urban areas. they are the saigon girls working hard from morning to supper and then going to school at night. these are the girls who left their parents when they graduated high school to find adventure in the big city. the city is full of "du dan" and the country is full of "hien".

as i understand this culture, there isn't a distinction for boys. most of the men exhibit similar characteristics: they are outgoing, friendly, loud, always smiling and definitely not afraid to take the reins.

the different cultures obviously have different standards of beauty. while university girls in america go to taning salons, girls here cover themselves head to toe in order to stay pasty white. girls here try to be "hien" and girls at home can't help but be "du dan". i think i'll always be attracted to "du dan" girls.